A wise man is said to have four things. Both inwardly and outwardly there are four techniques. They are called Sama, Dama, Bheda and Danda.
To deal with people in the world, to be in the world, the first thing you use is Sama. Sama means in a peaceful and understanding way. When that doesn’t work out, then you go to the second method as the rescue. The second method is Dana. Dana means allowing it to happen, forgiving, creating a space. When people don’t recognize your generosity in allowing them space, then the third principle comes, Bheda.
Bheda means to create a discrimination, make a difference, intentionally create a gap. If somebody is at loggerheads with you, first you talk to them. All problems arise because of lack of communication. If you communicate properly, talk to them with love, an evenness starts. When that dosen’t work out, then, with the same love, you just ignore them. If somebody makes a mistake, then ignore their mistake. Don’t take notice. Allow them to realize it for themselves. Your generosity, your letting go, should make people realize their mistake. If they don’t notice even then, then you start using difference, Bheda – create a difference. If two people are there, then you be partial to one another, because, by doing that, the other person will realize the mistake he has made.
In Dana, don’t create any difference. It is a very big thing to note. In life you deal with Bheda many times. You create difference. But it is not with awareness or intention. It is coming out of your unconsciousness. Consciously create a difference. This, a sensitive person will understand. Now, even then if they don’t come to the way, then take a stick, Danda, the final approach. If that person is insensitive even to the difference, what can you do with him? You have to take a stick. At last, with a stick, you make them realize.
The same four methods apply to your inner life, your Being. However, in inner life, it is not one after another. Sama, equqnimity, maintain the equanimity. If pleasant sensations come, so what. Watch them. If unpleasant sensations come, watch them too. Take it with equanimity. Meditation, yoga, all that is pertaining to Sama – Equanimity in the mind, inside. But observing equanimity becomes difficult for many people. Then Dana, which means giving up that which disturbs you, that which cannot put you in the royal seat of equanimity. What is it that disturbs you? A guilty feeling of doing something wrong or an egoistic feeling of having done something great. Both these feelings. This whole mind, with all its merits and demerits – give it away, surrender, Dana. There is a second aspect of inner growth in Dana. It is Giving. Giving includes forgiving also. Without surrender and love, your meditation will be dry. When you do something it should appear fresh. Every day you are new.
Now comes Bheda. Bheda – differentiate, separate the imperishable from the perishable. This very body is so hollow and so empty. We never realized before that inside our body there is so much emptiness! The whole body could be put into a small envelope. When you are watching the body, pleasant sensations arise, unpleasant sensations arise. As you watch, they will disappear.
Enlightenment is not just having some sensation. What has happened? Many people go and do different types of kundalini. They try raising different chakras. What are they doing? They are just playing with some sensations. You can even do this with acupuncture. Acupunsturists will put needles in different places. You can yell and shout and have the energy move up and down. It has some utility in the sense that it energizes you. It puts your mind a little bit in the present moment. But that’s all. Nothing beyond that. It doesn’t give you the knowledge of your Self, your Being, which is space, emptiness and fullness.
Then comes Danda – Danda means support. Determination and Commitment are the Danda. Your spiritual discipline is Danda. Mind is like a vine (creeper), it needs a support. Listening to spiritual discources, satsangs, practice, Guru’s presence are all the support, the Danda.
Peace, Peace and Peace !